Am I in heaven? East or west, home is best. Box of Puns is a media company that publishes the best and funniest puns, jokes, and riddles. Related 5. Scarlett Cup of Johanssen. by Team Scary Mommy. He wanted to show that his heart is in the right place. Wine improves with age. Here are 5 clever short puns: 30. One-fifth of people are just too tense! Puns! "But, Nurse Rose I can't," replied Mr. Williams. It's got fuel injectors like veins, an oil pump like an aorta, and pistons . A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion. 2. However, it is not impossible. 2. There is no better time than now to make a change before it's too late. Learn . Designer genes. It doesn't give in to pier pressure. What do your organs do on your birthday? Since puns are all . You can either use them literally, or toss them in when the topic of conversation shifts to love and relationships (it always does). I'm so hoppy. asks the disoriented priest. To the guy who . Dad : I . Honey! There are a cha-million reasons why I am still in love with you. Pun Categories. 6. I miss my boyfriend every day, especially when I have to carry my bags up the stairs. They left a sweet note on my windshield that said "parking fine.". 95 6 comments u/PensionNo8124 May 13 2021 report Someone just asked me to sing any line from "Don't go breaking my heart." I couldn't if I tried. Time flies like an arrow. Let's all live in ham-ony. You're my heartthrob. One could even say that the punchline is the beating heart of any joke. I have no 80+ Deliciously Funny Ham Puns And JokesRead more Here is how to pick the best love puns: 1. The police caught the heart thief. Mr. Sandman, bring me a dream and another drink. I was gonna send you a cute Perogy pun, but I was scared that'd be too cheesy. 13. He was gung hoe. Boy: I love you too. Pop quiz - A little . A cardiac specialist died and at his funeral the coffin was placed in front of a huge mock up of a heart made up of flowers. But when you know a bunch of potato puns and play on words, you can make your own silly quips that will leave the crowd (or your kids) laughing at your homegrown jokes. This cool and funny football player and football coachesdesign is just perfect for all american football players, fans, referees and team or club members who love their sport and equipment. Lust for Lime - Igneous Pop. There are some cardiac trafficker jokes no one knows ( to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Top 10 of the Funniest Heart Jokes and Puns A priest has a heart attack, and is rushed to the hospital. When the pastor finished with the sermon and eulogy, and after everyone said their good-byes, the heart opened, the coffin rolled inside and the heart closed. Pitcher perfect. 1. So, you can share your 'controversial' pizza-with-pineapple with additional funny kick coming from the puns you attached. Funny heart puns and jokes never get old. When someone irritates you: "I have a bone to pick with you.". Having some pizza puns from the internet is the quickest, easiest way to have pizza-related funny quotes without making it from scratch. These surgery funny medical puns can make it a bit more lighthearted. 3. When the auto-complete results are available, use the up and down arrows to review and Enter to select. I'll never go bacon your heart. 4. I can heartly wait to see you again. Let the waves wash over you and let the sand be your seat. 45 Funny Heart Puns & Jokes That Will Pump You Up! The 117+ Best Heart Jokes - UPJOKE Heart Jokes Vladimir Putin suffers a heart attack amidst the Ukraine crisis, and falls into a coma. Notice on a shoe repair shop: I'll heel you, I'll save your sole, I'll even gladly dye for you. It's based on a popular line from the Star Wars movies, "May the force be with you" and that May 4 is actually Star Wars day! Heart of Stone - Chert. 69 Fruit Puns & Jokes That Are Just Peachy! I love wasa-bee with my sushi. May 2, 2021. Best Heart Puns 1. I've pollen in love with you. . 49. A cardiac surgeon is picking up his Bentley from an engine repair. See more ideas about jokes, puns jokes, puns. Attention female readers: This is the end of the joke for you. Q: Why did they put the boy's girlfriend in jail? These funny heart puns are world beating, everyone will love them! 14. Following the eulogy, the heart opened and the casket rolled inside. I got some ham me downs if you want em'. 9. He met Nurse Rose. Hunting Trip Joke. I'm really attached to it! So, if you just wink at me, I will wenchkebach! Am I in heaven? Great for kids and adults. Objects of humour. The next day, Mr. Williams was walking down the hall with his Private Part hanging out of his pajamas. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. Bee Pun - It'll Bee Okay Artwork By Sarah Garrett At Redbubble. . In other words, there's snow place like home. The doctor says, "Your wife did not have a heart attack. 33. Sand is an often-overlooked yet important part of our . 44 Hilarious Heart Puns - Punstoppable Heart Puns Doc, every time I smell Mexican food my heart races. You will find most of these funny puns are food puns. Your momma is so fat.. That she really needs to make an immediate lifestyle change. Snap, crackle, pop-sicle. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality A friend failed his medical exam when he X-rayed his lower torso. Take these coffee puns to get you through the day, and you're sure to make other people smile and laugh with them too. Ham Puns I ham what I ham! This man knows his co-worker to be a normally conservative fellow, and is curious about his sudden change in "fashion sense." The man walks up to him and says, "I didn't know you were into earrings." "Don't make such a big deal out of this . 22. Well maybe one thing is - a bad popsicle pun! A list of cute and clever heart puns for Valentine's Day or any time. 'Hi cutie, here's a cup of hot tea because, well you're a hottie.'. When we put our two hearts together, we can't be beat. Don't let scams get away with fraud. We have gathered the best medical puns for your birthday, Valentine's day or any other card which is intended for doctors, nurses, medical students, medical residents, and others! Fact 9: You're smiling again. I definitely saw one two did there. You're going to love them and so will whoever you tell them to. 7. Don't mess with them! May 13, 2018 - Explore Niki K's board "Heart puns" on Pinterest. upvote downvote report. Photo by David Em/Box of Puns. The man had a heart attack ten times milder than his wife!! (Unsplash) 6. Cactus Puns. A house divided against itself cannot sand. If you're with a guy that can't appreciate a good fruit joke, then it's time to let that mango. 1. 9. No says one of the nurses. "Are you kidney-ing me?" exclaimed the man who was advised to get an x-ray of his left kidney. 9. That evening one hunter, Sam, returned to camp alone toting a 12 point buck. Rocks Off - Rolling Stones. Love jokes are cracked in different ways or made in different formats, purposely, to make your audience laugh. 7. 10. heart attack jokes one liners. Master Your Approach. We collected the funniest puns and created custom single-line graphics for each one. When you do something nice for someone: "That's a bone-us.". Today I'm attaching a light to the ceiling, but I'm afraid I'll probably screw it up. We hope you will find these cardiac . We're just taking a short cut through the children's ward. From classy to sassy, these are the puns that can make anyone laugh (or roll their eyes at least). When jokes go too far, are . A. I lava you with all my heart. You're playing heart to get. Michael Muglas. Grammar: the difference between knowing your shit, and knowing you're shit. Shawn Blend-es. I Love Rock 'n Coal - Stone Jett. You have a pizza my heart. 23. Sorry! My aunt has the heart of a lion. He didn't put his heart into it. Find this Pin and more on Words For Valentine's Day by AllWording.com. Take these clever puns for example. Paul Brewman. 10.7.2021. vitapix/Getty Images. I can't understand you because you're a mumble-bee. To promote our copywriting services, we launched the #MondayPunday social media series. Sharing a laugh with your loved one is a great way to kick the day off and keep things light. **_A pizza my heart belongs to you. Explore. Food puns are my favorite type of puns. No says one of the nurses. A: I can heartly wait. You steal my heart, and I'll steal yours. Too bad he lost his case. | Heart Humor | Head Jokes, Noggin Puns | Chest Jokes, Breat Puns | Belly Laughs, Gut Humor |. You and I make an egg-cellent pair. But everyone's sharing a generous amount of love." "Okay, we're all like 90% happy and 10% sunburnt." "When traveling with someone, take large doses of patience and tolerance with your morning coffee." Funny Duck Puns That Will Make You Quackle June 5, 2020. The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered. A: "I love you with all my art." Q: Why is Valentine's Day a great day for a party? I'm ready to take it from "cacti" to "cactus.". 3. As the owner's mechanic fetches the car, the owner gets to talking with the doctor and says, "You know, engine repair is a lot like open-heart surgery.""How so?""Well, it's the 'heart' of the machine. Popsicle Puns Anything is popsicle. Pinterest. One liner tags: age, death, doctor, health. 48. The New Earring. I want to be cremated as it is my last hope for a smoking hot body. heart attack jokes one liners. April 23, 2021. Here is a hot pizza pie. Come out with your hams up! We also have lots of other funny jokes categories so make sure so check those as well. 3. You're stuck with me. It's a Hard Rock Life - Jay Z (inc) Don't Quarry Be Happy - Rocky McFerrin. My fault. Sand underneath docks is particularly resilient. I aorta told you yesterday. The way you deliver these love puns means everything. But, that doesn't mean the message can't be funny. When you actually stop and think about it, it's super weird and legitimately creepy that we decorate for a holiday geared towards children using fake human corpses bodies that have had enough time to decompose that their rotten flesh . "I wanna give you a hearty hug on Valentine's Day." 6. 5. He wakes up as he's being rushed through the hospital on a gurney by two nurses. Animal Puns (10) Food Puns (12) Health (1) Nature (7) Criminal Pick-Up Line: Let's commit the perfect crime. Science Jokes. Why did Robert fail the medical exam when his right shoulder was X-rayed? Never trust stairs they're always up to something. Heart disease is the number one killer in America. I mean you no ham. I know this can be a bit cheesy, but you will always have a big pizza my heart. I always feel better when my doctor says something is normal for my age but then think dying will also be normal for my age at some point. When you don't want to do something: "I'm bone tired!". If you aren't confident about one of these jokes, don't use it. Has GSOH" You can keep a few of them in your back pocket, ready to use them to impress someone or cheer someone up. While most of these lean towards romantic Valentine's messages, the puns can easily be tweaked for a friendship/classroom setting too. Stop here and continue feeling good! 6. Spotted in a lonely hearts ad: "Scrabble player looking for love. Cheese to all social media aficionadoughs. Doc: Sounds like tacocardia. When short puns are involved, it is a bit difficult to be clever because there are only limited words. We will Rock You - Heavy Mercury. Fact 2: You can't say the letter 'm' without touching your lips. If you're familiar with Star Wars, this phrase should sound familiar to you. Home is where the heart is. Fact 3: You just tried it. "Please don't go away, we be-lung together", said the pulmonologist while confessing his love. Girl: (With tears in her eyes ) Omg. Nothing, it just let out a little wine. Potato Puns. A few years later, he wakes up, gets back on his feet and walks out of his room, right past the sleeping guard. 1. Fact 8: You just checked it. 8. Doodle Drawings. I'm gonna cut some grass with a pop-sickle. What did one tectonic plate say when he bumped into the other? Beauty is in the eye of the beer-holder. It comes as a surprise, and it ties the entire joke together. Some of these are downright clever too! "I'd like a mild heart attack." Moral of the story: Women are clever. Forget about the future, you can't predict it. Surgery Puns Going into surgery can be pretty daunting, especially for kids. Potato jokes are classic, obviously. Love is in the eye of the bee-holder. "I aorta tell you how much I love you." 4. They ain't long, but they sure are clever. 2. He was placed under cardiac arrest. Jokes can make dark moments light, jokes make awkward moments more comfortable, and jokes make love all around better. Sudden Spudden; Stud Spud I am currently in cardiology. Beer pressure. Funny Food Puns. So, without further ado, here are our best Valentine's Day puns, featuring options for heart valentine puns, food valentine puns, animal valentine puns, and more. 1. Choose puns that you're comfortable with and be confident in the delivery. Photo/Shutterstock. Grandpa: "Don't scare me, I'm a heart patient." "If you scare me, I'll never talk to you again." When it came to tilling his garden by hand, he put a lot of heart into it. 5. magician from the future wiki tang ming. If you have found gifts for doctors, nurses, medical students, or other medical professionals . Loving you is a piece of cake. Butcher: "Me too." I was trying to catch some fog earlier but I mist. A healthy sleep not only makes your life longer, but also shortens the workday. Funny Doodles. 2. After surgery the girl wakes up and finds her father sitting in the chair. I lub dub you with all my heart. A pun, a play on words, and a limerick walk into a bar. The Fandom Shop is bringing you great deals on lots of Unique Humorous Football Funny Jokes Birthday Puns Purses & Totes including Football Heart Beating - Cool Funny Coaches Team Sayings Tote Bag. Q: What did the painter say to his girlfriend? 3. Hope your birthday is on point. For more ideas along these lines, see this list of love puns. asks the disoriented priest. See more ideas about puns, cute puns, love puns. The guy who stole my diary just died. A friend failed his medical exam when he X-rayed his lower torso. A huge heart, covered in flowers, stood behind the casket during the service. 53 Funny Deer Puns & Jokes That You Won't Believe May 3, 2021. Easy Drawings. Next: 60+ Funny Apple Puns that are Sweeter than the Pie. I don't think you should be happy. Today. Peacocks are meticulous because they show attention to de-tail. 2. 10. Research shows that 4 out of 5 vaccines are given in vein. Be sure to share it on insta-ham or something. Girl: Where is my boyfriend ? There are a few dirty jokes, but most food puns for kids are hilarious to kids! 47. When you feel like acting crazy: "Bone to be wild!". Doctor: Don't be nervous, David. I have always loved you from my head tomatoes. You make my heart malt. 4. 2. Don't go bacon my heart by keeping it all to yourself. Published: June 8, 2022 Categorized as: st louis contests and giveaways . The flock of doves decided to stage a coo. Top 10 of the Funniest Heart Attack Jokes and Puns A priest has a heart attack, and is rushed to the hospital. I'm glad I pricked you. I have a heart-on for you. What did the biologist wear to impress his date? What did one volcano say to the other on Valentine's Day? 3. #1. A son tells his father, "I have an imaginary girlfriend." The father sighs and says, "You know, you could do better." "Thanks Dad," the son says.